The Social Effects of Clutter

It’s almost as though Mia described the house I lived in while I was married. My goodness this is spot on to what was going on at Val Lane!

  • Messy house
  • Embarrassed to have others over
  • Children stressed with clutter around

Interestingly, since I moved out, apparently the house is far cleaner than it was when I was there. I asked my children if they thought I was the source of the mess. “Absolutely not,” they assured me. My place is spotless.

Why then do you think the house is cleaner these days? They pondered . . . I did not press. I think they recognize that the focus is different with me gone.

There were controlling mechanisms at play when I lived there. I do believe the constant state of messiness was used to provide a buffer between the spouses. With the mess there, my ex-wife “protected” herself because she knew it bothered me to live in her squalor. Keeping it messy kept me on edge. She worked like that.

At the time, I just couldn’t understand why someone would live as she did. It’s easy to see with distance. This was a way to cause friction. Some relationships only exist with friction. I think that explains a lot of the past two decades.

These days: clean, organized, and healthy. It’s good for the soul.

Also blogged on this date . . .

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